I’m glad that Bilbo Baggins exists
Because in the book, the dude was pretty firmly middle aged when his crazy-ass adventure started
He was settled down in the house that belonged to his parents and had done precisely jack shit with his life
It gives me hope that maybe some nutcase wizard will eventually show up and be like yo
you’re a burglar now
don’t even care that you didn’t roll rogue homie we got dragons to slay and kingdoms to save
"This is why you can’t trust women! They’re so good at makeup and wear it to fool guys into thinking they’re hot!"
shit. girls he’s on to us *washes off makeup to reveal lizard face and climbs up a wall* we will return with a new disguise. soon the power of earthly men will fall